Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
