Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
