i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
