these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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