i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Randomize
