I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
