she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
