This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
It's never too late to be topless.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
