Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
