i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
