Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
You took a bar mat shot.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
