she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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