No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
