ugly people sure do ruin things
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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