I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
