I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Boobs speak an international language.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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