make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
