May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
