tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
