Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I hate your face
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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