Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
