so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
