You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
