Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
