i already hear my dad disowning me
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
