can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
