hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
