im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
