Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize