Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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