nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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