so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
