I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
