so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
