the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
