So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
