I'm jealous of your bromance
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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