he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
