Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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