A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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