Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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