Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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