im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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