I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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