playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
