well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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