loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
