no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
