found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
