just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
There r osticjed everywhere
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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